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… to emotional intelligence at work

Newsletter 37 : 21 june 2010

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Greetings
Welcome to our newsletter. We like to offer a change from other newsletters which can demand an awful lot of reading.

Inspirational video of the week

The Raspyni Brothers make an emotional appeal for less Powerpoint and more juggling in presentations. Very amusing. (duration 15:31)

Puzzle of the week

There is a certain town with one male barber who, every day, shaves every man who doesn’t shave himself, and no one else. Does the barber shave himself?

Thoughts for the week

Listening, not imitation, may be the sincerest form of flattery
Dr Joyce Brothers, psychologist

Imitation, if noble and general, insures the best hope of originality
Edward G Bulwer-Lytton, C19 politician, poet and novelist (not many of those these days)

By three methods we may learn wisdom: first, by reflection, which is noblest; second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third, by experience, which is the most bitter.
K’ung-fu-tzu (Confucius) 551-479 BC, clearly advocating a course of interpretative coaching from emotional intelligence at work.

Joke of the week

Mary’s father has five daughters: Nana, Nene, Nini, Nono and… ?? What is the name of the fifth daughter? Answer below.

Emotional intelligence precept of the week

emotional intelligence at work teaches a number of precepts which it would be useful, helpful to live by. The important point of these principles is that their usefulness is independent of whether they are true or not (though, we believe they are true). This time, it is

Give up all judgment

When we judge someone we apply a label to them that it is virtually impossible for them to remove. If we judge someone to be a poor manager then we will interpret everything they do in the light of that belief. Our judgments are often ill-informed—or at least under-informed—and we naturally fill in the gaps in the data we have using our judgments and beliefs to guide us. Thus, in judgment, we do not allow people to grow and change.

Judgment keeps us separate from those we judge. In seeing them as wrong, we lose the learning opportunity and the creative opportunity that the relationship offers.

Judgment starts power struggles. If we were to be totally free of judgments then we would respond to those around us with compassion. We would see those behaviours or characteristics that can give rise to judgment simply as a call to help the other person. This would naturally lead to greater bonding and cohesiveness in our relationships.*

Quotations of the week

If you’re going to tell people the truth, be funny or they’ll kill you.

If there’s anything I hate more than being taken seriously, it’s being taken too seriously.

I’d worship the ground you walked on if only you walked in a better neighborhood.

Billy Wilder, born 22 June 1906

Lunch of the month

emotional intelligence at work sponsors and hosts the Bristol NRG lunch. If you’re uncertain about how to get business from networking, contact us to discuss coaching in your networking technique. A short coaching programme will pay for itself as soon as you put on clients.

The next Bristol events are on 15 July, 19 August and 16 September at Berwick Lodge (near Cribbs Causeway) which offers an excellent light lunch in elegant surroundings. The July prelunch seminar is So tell me, where do I find those referrals, and how do I “get you in?” by Jill Green, a senior trainer at the Referral Institute.

Just go here to book. NRG is offering readers of this newsletter who are new to NRG £5 off a lunch at Berwick Lodge: enter the promotion code NRGKMCM.
Join NRG now and they’ll waive the £100 joining fee.

Answer: Mary

Contributions gratefully received.
Thanks this time to Jeff Allen and Ian Haugh

If you have been, thank you for reading.
Kay and Jeremy